In our effort to keep #purity within our 15 year old son, I want to share the struggles we face to keep him pure. Let me set this up for you... He has a girlfriend who is also 15 years old. He has a cell phone with no data plan. He has an ipod hooked into the home wifi. He has a Wii and a PS3, both with internet through he wifi. He has a DSI and a PSP, both with internet through the wifi. He has a facebook account also.
People say get safe eyes or covenant eyes to protect the computers (home and laptop). That's solid advice, except for the fact that he is never on a computer. We protect the router using OPEN DNS that filters and blocks things based on my our criteria. We keep this set to highly secure to keep all forms of porn and other things we don't want him exposed to out of the house and off his devices. We have also blocked you tube at the router and through open dns.
So along with all these measures, the electronic devices go through semi regular inspections. We check text messages, safari history, google searches, email, and palringo. We monitor FB activity. It is alot of work and stress to ensure all the protection programs and systems are working properly.
Before you judge, we have a great son. We trust him. He is a natural leader and rarely follows the crowd. We survived middle school with no incidents. Some say we go overboard, and those that say that to us never check their sons activity. We know that porn addiction can be avoided by delaying initial exposure to porn. We are aware that he will not avoid porn for his entire life, but if we can do our best to avoid exposure then maybe he will be in the 50% of men that do not have a porn problem.
Maybe the best solution is to just turn the internet off in the house.
Would love to hear your thoughts on this topic!
Based on my experience you already meet the most important criteria; you care. Your son is not likely to ever understand all of the things you said or did, but he will remember that you cared. Even when you make mistakes, you cared.
ReplyDeleteYour comments reveal that you already know that turning off the Internet is futile. The only solution is to turn your son's discernment on. The only way to do that is to encourage him to think. You do this by revealing your values and encouraging him to develop his own. His friends and the "world" will be competing for his values, too. It is the most important work you will ever do. God bless you for caring.